Lately I have been thinking a lot about a teacher's own emotional perspective in the classroom... It just seems to me that for a long time some of what I did in the classroom was done not because it was what the kids needed, but rather because I was insecure in my own abilities. I remember being very unwilling to try a new strategy that had the possibility of flopping because then, if someone was passing by, or if my principal walked in, I might be discovered as a below standard teacher, or something of the like. Now that I have been going at this a while longer it just seems that things go better when am asking myself the question, "what do the KIDS really need right now?" as opposed to, "how can I keep myself from making a mistake and being a "lesser than" teacher?". How do you get that more educationally functional place? I have been teaching 9 years and still feel like I am dealing with that quite a bit!
"that kid better behave or I am a bad teacher!".... sound familiar? Hummmmm
3 comments:
You know, if you are a good teacher, those feelings never go away. Teachers always need to question and try to improve their practice. If I ever think I know it all - I need to find a new profession. :-) But change is scary. And it is easy to "try" something new, have it bomb, and say, "Oh, that didn't work." Back to one's comfort zone. But if what you are trying is grounded in solid research and proven practice, then it is worth another try. And even a third or fourth. I know when I try something new, and it bombs, I ask myself, what can I do to make it better? What did I do wrong? I don't think that is insecurity - you are just trying to improve. Those "mistakes" are what help you improve and grow as a teacher. Mistakes are a gift - they help you see your practice more clearly and allow you to become better. :-)
I found your blog through a friend of a friend of a friend...I'm a teacher, too and completely agree that we need to keep re-creating ourselves as teachers: trying new strategies, adjusting our curriculum, etc. I've been teaching almost ten years, and every year there is something I feel I could've done better. I can't relate at all to some of the teachers I had in high school who gave out the same assignments to both me and my younger brother (who is six years younger than me). Lifelong learning is a hallmark of good teaching, and errors are the portals of discovery.
Oh, but I think it's easier to not be afraid to make mistakes when you're tenured:)
tenure... the great safety net. Well I guess it can be. I have to admit that there have been a couple teachers that I have really wandered about their abilities to really function well in the shaping of young minds. For good or for bad, I am glad that I am tenured though.
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